Birth Day

It has finally arrived. A much thought about and anticipated day has come without fail. Each child's birthday is a special day. Whether it is the 1st or the 31st. It was the day that they arrived into the world and stated a fresh moment in time. So, obviously with the twins birthday having arrived I am so happy. My babies are growing up. This year has flown by and I'm not sure that I am happy about it (insert sad face). I have enjoyed having babies around again. Their sweet hearts and cuddly little bodies is wonderful. I will miss this stage just as I miss each stage we blow through.
Jeff & I stood in our kitchen this morning while the girls laid in their nap nannies drinking their morning bottle. He reminded me that we had JUST fallen asleep after having a long long night one year ago. The night I went in to labor was extremely long, tiring, and scary. We were placed in a broom closet for one and it was about 100 degrees in there. I was pumped full of medicine that made me feel terrible and then became physicially sick from the pain. Vomitting while pregnant is about as fun as having a splinter. I knew that I was thankful to see the sunrise! Then I fell asleep. I don't remember anything after that until my grandparents arrived which was about 8 hours later. Thank goodness for lack of memory, right. This day one year ago was the most emotionally exhausting day I will more than likely ever experience. Jeff & I would remind ourselves over and over again just to think of the future and how we would look back one year later. I have never been more confused of my emotions at any moment than the moment the doctors told me they were beginning to cut. It was a feeling of terror+peace+relief.
Standing there with Jeff I stared at Blake in amazement. When you think back to the day she was born, knowing she was lifeless and broken, knowing she probably wasn't going to live one day past her birthday, dreading the 1 year mark if she hadn't made it, it truly is a miracle to see her even smile. More less crawl, stand, laugh, and play. They were so tiny and fragile. Looking at their 20 some odd pound chunky bodies now it is hard to imagine a once so tiny body that your fingers could wrap around their legs and your hand stretched almost the length of their body.
I am so glad that I am singing happy birthday to a set of twins this year instead of only one and visiting the others grave marker. The Lord provided our family with a blessing two times over. He knew that we needed a deeper understanding of the value life, love, and true friendship from others. Instead of him teaching us a lesson he blessed us. Looking over it now, one year later, it is so obvious to see. Funny how that works,huh.
I want to thank each of you for your kindness and prayers over this last year. I know some of you and don't know some of you but you all are precious friends in my book. Our family is blessed! Happy Birthday to my girls Blake & Palmer. You are little miracles.